The Best Bedtime Routine for Insomnia: A Calm, Step-by-Step Night Plan

If you live with insomnia, you have probably heard a lot of vague advice like "just relax" or "have a routine." But when you are actually exhausted and wired at the same time, you need more than a slogan—you need a clear, realistic bedtime routine for insomnia that you can follow step by step.

This guide gives you exactly that: a calm, practical night plan you can try tonight, even if your sleep has been difficult for months or years.

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What a bedtime routine is really for

When you have insomnia, it is easy to think a bedtime routine is a kind of magic spell: if you do the right steps in the right order, you will fall asleep instantly.

In reality, a bedtime routine has three main jobs:

1. Signal to your brain that the day is closing and sleep is coming.
2. Turn down physical arousal (heart rate, muscle tension, stress hormones).
3. Reduce mental stimulation (worry, planning, late-night scrolling).

A good routine does not guarantee sleep. Instead, it gives your body the best possible conditions to do what it is already designed to do.

If you want a broader overview of healthy habits around sleep, you can also read: The Ultimate Sleep Hygiene Checklist and Beginner Sleep Routine.

Before you start: 3 foundations that make any routine work better

Before we get into the minute-by-minute plan, three background habits make any bedtime routine for insomnia more effective:

A consistent wake-up time

Waking up at roughly the same time each day (including weekends) trains your body clock. Over time, this makes you feel sleepy at more predictable times in the evening.

Caffeine timing

For most people, stopping caffeine 6–8 hours before bed helps. That includes coffee, strong tea, energy drinks, and cola.

Daylight and movement

Getting some light and movement during the day—even a short walk—can make it easier to feel naturally sleepy at night.

If these foundations are not perfect yet, do not panic. Just know that your bedtime routine will usually work better as these habits slowly improve. For more on this, see: How to Fall Asleep Faster and Sleep Hygiene Checklist.

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Your 60-minute bedtime routine for insomnia

You can adjust times to your life, but here is a simple template.

Step 1 – 60 minutes before bed: Close the "daytime tab"

Goal: Stop new stress from entering your brain.

What to do:

• Stop demanding tasks: no more work emails, finances, homework, or intense problem-solving.
• Name tomorrow's top 3 priorities:
  • Take 3–5 minutes to write down the three most important things for tomorrow.
  • If you like, also jot a basic plan: "Call X", "Finish Y task", "Shop for Z".
  • This helps your brain feel that tomorrow is handled, so it does not need to plan everything at 1 a.m.

If your mind tends to spin with worries, you can turn this into a short "Worry Window" (a CBT-I tool): write down your worries and one small step for each. We talk more about this in: How to Calm Your Mind at Night

Step 2 – 45 minutes before bed: Light, screens, and stimulation down

Goal: Tell your body clock that night is here.

What to do:

• Dim the lights:
  • Use lamps instead of bright overhead lights.
  • Avoid bright white/blue light shining directly in your face.
• Tame screens:
  • If possible, stop using phones, laptops, and tablets for work or social media.
  • If you must use a screen:
    • Turn on night mode.
    • Lower brightness.
    • Stick to calmer content (no arguments, news, or doomscrolling).

This is not about perfection; it is about reducing stimulation, not eliminating it.

Step 3 – 30 minutes before bed: Move into "body calm" mode

Goal: Help your muscles and nervous system shift out of "go mode".

Pick one or two gentle activities:

Warm shower or bath

• Warm water relaxes muscles.
• After you get out, your core body temperature drops slightly, which can help your body feel ready for sleep.

Light stretching or yoga

• Focus on slow movements and easy stretches.
• Avoid intense workouts at this time; those are better earlier in the day.

Quiet tidy-up (optional)

• A quick 5-minute tidy in your bedroom can make the space feel more restful.
• Do this gently, not as a big cleaning project.

Your bedroom environment matters too. For help making it more sleep-friendly, see: Bedroom Checklist

Step 4 – 15 minutes before bed: Gentle mind-calming

Goal: Give your busy mind something soothing to focus on.

Choose one of these options:

Calm reading

• Read something light and non-work-related.
• Paper book or e-reader with dimmed, warm light is ideal.

Guided breathing

Try a simple 4–6 pattern:

• Inhale through your nose for 4 seconds.
• Exhale gently through your mouth for 6 seconds.
• Repeat for 2–5 minutes.
• Keep your breath comfortable and easy, not forced.

Short gratitude or "done" list

• Write 3 small things that went okay or that you handled today.
• This is not forced positivity; it is about showing your brain the day is finished and not all bad.

If you like structured breathing exercises, you may enjoy: Breathing Exercises

Step 5 – Bedtime: In bed, invite sleep (without forcing it)

Goal: Keep your bed associated with rest, not stress.

When you get into bed:

Set a gentle intention

Instead of "I must sleep now", try:

"I am giving my body a chance to rest. Sleep will come when it is ready."

Use a calm focus if your thoughts wander

You can:

• Repeat a simple phrase quietly in your mind, like "In… out…" with each breath.
• Or imagine a neutral, repetitive scene (walking along a beach, watching clouds).

If you are still very awake after ~20–30 minutes

And you feel frustrated, tense, or panicky:

• Gently get out of bed.
• Go to a dimly lit room or chair.
• Do something calm (reading, soft music, a simple puzzle).
• Return to bed only when you feel sleepier.

This is a key CBT-I principle: bed = sleep and rest, not "place where I panic about not sleeping". You can learn more in: CBT-I Techniques

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Short on time? A 20-minute "emergency" routine

Some nights, the full 60-minute routine is not realistic. That is okay. Here is a shorter version if you are already late and tired.

Total: 20 minutes

Minutes 0–5: Quick brain offload

• Write tomorrow's top 3 tasks.
• If one worry is repeating, park it in a notebook with "I will handle this tomorrow by doing X".

Minutes 5–10: Light + screens down

• Turn off overhead lights.
• Put your phone on "do not disturb".
• Avoid checking email or social media again.

Minutes 10–15: 5-minute body calm

• Do 3–4 gentle stretches (neck, shoulders, back, legs).
• Or take a quick warm shower if it helps you relax.

Minutes 15–20: Breathing in bed

• Get into bed.
• Do 4–6 breathing (inhale 4 seconds, exhale 6 seconds) for about 5 minutes.
• If thoughts come, acknowledge them and gently bring your focus back to the breath.

Even a short routine sends the message: "The day is finished; it is time to slow down."

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Adjusting the routine for anxiety and racing thoughts

If anxiety is a big part of your insomnia, you may want to emphasise these parts of the routine:

Make the Worry Window non-negotiable

Use the 60 or 20-minute routine, but protect at least 5–10 minutes earlier in the evening to write down worries and next steps.

In bed, when thoughts pop up, tell yourself:

"This is noted. I have time set aside for this tomorrow."

Use compassionate self-talk in Step 5

When you notice harsh thoughts like "I will be useless tomorrow" or "I am broken", gently replace them with:

• "I can still function even if I am tired."
• "My brain is trying to protect me. It is just overworking."

Consider adding a grounding exercise

In Step 4 or Step 5, you can do a quick grounding:

Name 5 things you see, 4 you feel, 3 you hear, 2 you can smell or taste, and 1 thing you appreciate.

For a deeper dive into calming bedtime anxiety, see: How to Calm Your Mind at Night

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Adjusting the routine if you keep waking at 3 A.M.

If your main problem is waking up around 3 a.m. and struggling to fall back asleep, a bedtime routine still helps—but you may also need a "middle-of-the-night" mini-routine.

At bedtime, follow the steps above. Then, if you wake at 3 a.m.:

Stay calm about the time

• Try not to check the clock repeatedly.
• Remind yourself: "Waking up in the night happens. Resting quietly is still helpful."

Use soft focus again

Return to gentle breathing or a neutral mental image.

If you are wide awake after ~20–30 minutes

Get out of bed and repeat a shortened version of the calming steps:

• Dim light.
• Calm reading or audio.
• Return to bed when sleepiness increases.

For more specific strategies, read: Why You Wake Up at 3 A.M.

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Try this for one week

A bedtime routine for insomnia works best when you repeat it, not when you try it once and judge the result.

For the next 7 nights, try:

• Sticking to roughly the same wake-up time.
• Following either the 60-minute or 20-minute routine each night.
• Treating it as an experiment, not a test you can fail.

You might track:

• How long it roughly feels like it takes to fall asleep.
• How often you wake in the night.
• How you feel in the morning (0–10 tiredness scale).

If you like tracking, you can use our guide: Sleep Tracking Basics. If tracking makes you more anxious, it is okay to skip it.

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FAQ: Bedtime routines and insomnia

How long should a bedtime routine be?

For most adults, a bedtime routine of 30–60 minutes works well. It does not need to be complicated—just a consistent period where you reduce stimulation and send "it's night now" signals to your brain. On busy nights, even 20 minutes is better than nothing.

Do I have to do the exact same thing every night?

No, but some repetition helps. Your brain learns patterns: if you often dim the lights, stretch a little, and read for 10 minutes before bed, it starts to associate those actions with sleepiness. You can rotate activities, but try to keep the overall shape similar.

What if my schedule changes a lot (shifts, kids, work)?

If your bedtime moves around, focus on:

• A consistent pre-sleep sequence, even if the clock time varies.
• A steady wake-up time on as many days as possible.
• Protecting a shorter 20-minute routine on chaotic nights.

Perfection is not required. Small consistency is better than no consistency.

Is it okay to watch TV as part of my routine?

It depends:

• If TV makes you more relaxed, the room is dim, and the content is not too intense, it can be okay.
• But if TV leads to binge-watching, strong emotions, or staying up much later than planned, it may be worth moving it earlier in the evening and keeping the last 30–60 minutes screen-light.

Can I use my phone in my bedtime routine?

You can, but with limits:

• Try to avoid scrolling social media, reading stressful news, or dealing with work messages close to bed.
• If you use your phone for calm audio, guided breathing, or a sleep story, that can be part of your routine.
• Use "do not disturb" or focus modes to reduce notifications.

How long until a bedtime routine starts helping my insomnia?

Some people notice small changes within a few nights. For others, especially with long-term insomnia, it can take a few weeks of gentle consistency before nights feel more stable. Remember that a routine is one part of insomnia care; CBT-I, medical evaluation, or therapy may also help.

What if I follow the routine and still cannot sleep?

That can happen, especially with chronic insomnia. A routine lowers the "volume" on stress and stimulation, but it does not instantly override long-standing sleep patterns.

If after several weeks you are still struggling—especially if you have insomnia 3+ nights per week for 3 months or more—it is worth talking to a doctor or sleep specialist. CBT-I (cognitive behavioural therapy for insomnia) is one of the most effective non-drug approaches. You can read more here: CBT-I Techniques

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Conclusion

A bedtime routine for insomnia is not about perfection or tricks. It is about repeating small, kind signals to your body and brain: the day is ending, you are safe enough, and it is time to slow down.

By closing the "daytime tab", dimming stimulation, calming your body, and gently guiding your mind, you give sleep the best chance to arrive—naturally, in its own time. Start with just a few steps tonight, and let your routine grow with you.